I went to a Christmas party for our amateur radio club this past weekend. As I was getting dressed, I remembered to put on a necklace one of the other club members and his wife had given me a couple of years ago. Their daughter had made it and embossed it with my ham radio call sign. When I walked in, the wife lit up with pleasure at seeing me wear it. I was surprised how much it seemed to mean to her that I had it on.
But I shouldn’t have been surprised.
As I think about her reaction, I remember so many small, thoughtful gestures, comments, and actions by friends, family, or even strangers that have touched me and made such a difference in my life. And I think about the things I’ve done that others have seemed touched by. More often than not, these are little things:
- A phone call to see if I was okay or thanking me for something I’d done or said
- A note in the mail expressing encouragement or gratitude
- A hand on my shoulder for a job well done
- A thermos of coffee when my electricity had been out all night
- Kindnesses to my children
- My husband holding me without words when I need to cry
- A “May I help you?” from a stranger when I was lost or confused about where to go
- A book or movie recommendation because someone knew me well enough to think I’d love them
- An offer of help from a man in the metro station when he saw me struggling with my bag
Widows are touched when you remember them on the anniversary of their husband’s death. Those who’ve lost pets appreciate a card as much as someone who has lost a family member.
Little things matter more than we realize.
It’s so easy to ignore those little nudges of Spirit whispering a suggestion to do something that might seem—at the time—a little random, a little inconvenient, too small to matter.
But little things DO matter.
They matter a lot. They make a difference in someone else’s life, and what better legacy can we leave than one of making a difference?
Elizabeth,
My mom and her mother had an interesting idea for doing small, thoughtful gestures for family and friends. Whenever they would see a name they recognized mentioned in the paper or perhaps a magazine article, they would mail a clipping or their copy of the magazine to the person. Not only does it acknowledge seeing a friends name in print, but it also provides additional originals that the recipient can send to others. I have been fortunate enough to be on the receiving end of this and can tell you that sometimes, I did not even know an article had been published with my name in it.
This is a wonderful idea, Andy, and it DOES mean a great deal to people. And here’s a related tip — when you see an article about the child of someone you know (honor roll, sports activity, etc.), cut that out and either send it to the child, or send it to the parent you know. We always love have a spotlight shown on our children.
Well said, Elizabeth. And you are so right. I remember the little things more often than the big things (or the big gifts), because they show that someone actually cares, about me, my feelings, my sadness, my triumphs.
That’s exactly right, Karen! These small gestures convey caring more than some grand show.
Elizabeth, you know how I feel about “little things” and how meaningful they can be years later. I can also see the glow on her face when you wore the callsign necklace. What a neat couple they are!
Indeed I do, Esther! You have written movingly about them in your blogs, and you’re the kind of person who does those little kindnesses to others all the time. Thanks so much for reading and commenting!
I feel that every interaction we have with other human beings, every day, is an opportunity to make their world better or worse. And when you share a smile it is amazing how great you both feel.
Oh, Katherine, I’m SO glad you reminded us all of the importance of a smile. That can be one of the most powerful gifts of all! Thanks so much for commenting!
I think little things matter more than all the big things combined. Those are truly the ‘things’ that I remember. When a friend chisels a little heart out of a broken stained glass window, when a college roomie sends me a handmade angel for the top of my Christmas tree (which I’ve used for over 30 Christmases now!), when a daughter creates a collage of the two of us over the years. How these ‘little things’ melt into our heart and stay there – forever. xo
Oh, I love that image: “How these little things melt into our heart…” Yes, they really do, don’t they! Thank you for you MANY expressions of support in the form of thoughtful comments, Pamela!
Oh Elizabeth, they do matter. I remember one when I was working in assisted living and one of my older clients was walking by, I patted her on the shoulder. She said that I had made her day. She was sort of crochety and cantankerous but I enjoyed her a lot. And not to pat myself on the shoulder please, but Julie and I had lunch together one day and I noticed she didn’t have a seatbelt cover. I asked if she’d like one and she said yes, but it would have to be grey. Well, it’s been quite a while, but I finally found a nice piece of grey fabric and made it for her. Got it off in the mail and come to find out Gary had been hoarding the mail in his truck. Once she finally opened it, she was surprised that I even remembered and that I got the color right. No big effort, but it brightened her day.
Alice, I know from firsthand experience that you are the best when it comes to thoughtful acts of kindness! People love things that you’ve made, and they say without words, “I thought of you and I cared enough to take the time to do this.”