It is always an honor to introduce a new Connection Messenger* to Heartspoken.com. Today’s guest writer is Jane Pollak, a remarkably talented, genuine, and deeply spiritual woman, whose book Soul Proprietor: 101 Lessons from a Lifestyle Entrepreneur first confirmed my belief in a holistic approach to business. We bring our whole selves to our business and our life—our heart and soul—and our relationship with money, our money issues, if you will, is an integral part of that and reflects both our relationship with God and our relationship with ourselves. I found this piece extremely thought-provoking, and I commend her course to you if it seems like a good fit (see info below post).
So many of us have issues around money: gambling, credit card debting, hoarding, big-shot-ism. The medium of money has a way of revealing our personal idiosyncrasies, whether it’s once in a while or chronically. Like food, another commodity that can take on enormous meaning, we reward ourselves, deprive ourselves, binge, purge or starve.
My personal issue is something I’ve heard labeled ‘anorexic spending.’ That means I don’t like to spend a single dollar until I have a hundred or a thousand to back it up. I like to hold onto what I have and fear spending. This is not a viable formula for life.
Which brings me to my current fear of money. I’m in the process of furnishing a new apartment I just bought. I’m investing in a piece of NYC property, and I want to add to what I already own to make it beautiful. I have money in my apartment account that I’ve earmarked for this occasion. Yet it’s still hard for me to pull the trigger as I check out at Pottery Barn, West Elm, and Restoration Hardware making purchases. My gremlins are forming a chorus and singing, “You can get it cheaper!” and “Do you really need that?”
Familiar?
Those deeply etched beliefs show up as I’m getting ready to make a decision and ebb once I’ve clicked SUBMIT ORDER. I don’t suffer from buyer’s remorse. It’s more paralysis leading up to the spending.
Fortunately, I’ve been working for years to reverse the old messages I picked up as a child. One of my early gurus, Wayne Dyer, talked about having to pay (and I’m making this up, but you get the idea) $5000 for something important, a surgery or a piece of equipment. He was concerned about spending that much money. When he went to his mailbox after making the decision to go ahead and invest this amount on behalf of his well-being, there was a check there for $4960 from an unexpected source he’d forgotten.
He talked about how the Universe presents these ‘coincidences’ over and over again. So I began paying attention to these ‘coincidences’ and discovered they are God’s way of remaining anonymous.
I’m moving soon and felt afraid about the cost of the physical move. I’m loathe to let go of money, even when I have it. Then I remembered that my security deposit on my current apartment meets the cost of the move almost to the penny. I find these coincidences occurring over and over again in my life when I’m moving in the right direction for me. I call them winks from the Universe and feel a deep connection with Source that this is the right step for me to take.
Rather than the old chestnut, “I’ll believe it when I see it,” Wayne Dyer says, “You’ll see it, when you believe it.” I see evidence every day of God’s abundance.
Because I look for it.
Jane Pollak is one of the Northeast’s foremost coaches of entrepreneurial women and a living example of how to turn a passion into a thriving business. A successful entrepreneur, author, and business coach, Jane’s story is an odyssey that led her from remote craft fairs and customer rejections to an invitation to the White House and appearances on NBC’s Today Show. In addition to coaching, speaking nationally and blogging, she hosts Remarkable Women networking events and seasonal retreats. Learn more at www.janepollak.com.
[stextbox id=”stb_style_870581″]* What’s a Connection Messenger? At Heartspoken, a Connection Messenger is someone who helps point the way to strengthening one of life’s essential connections: with God, with self, with others, or with nature. [/stextbox]
Joy Sightings* After The Winter Storm
Like Jane, I’m very slow to let go of money. Like Karen, I’ve lived on very little and I’ve lived comfortably. Once I make the decision to spend money, though…having duly examined every angle…I spend it and don’t look back. Having just done that, I am now enjoying an almost-new car after driving my last one for 9 years. Every time I get in that car, I do a little high-5 with myself. YESSS, I love this car!! And I love being able to make life easier for the grandson who so desperately needed transportation. He loves my old one. This may turn out to be an unwise decision. I might wind up with lots of unforeseen expenses. If so, I’ll shed a tear or two and move on. And will STILL love my new car!
Esther, I just found your comment in my “unapproved” batch — perhaps WordPress doesn’t recognize your new email. Anyway thank you so much for sharing your experience. I’ll be we all have, or had, a car that we loved because it was the first one that was really ours. Thanks for bringing back that heady memory and I’m so glad you’re getting that kind of pleasure out of yours.
Oh my gosh, this speaks to me. I’ve had so many money issues over the years. The lean years – as a single mother when I wasn’t sure how I would buy gas for the car or groceries for the pantry. To being married and having two okay incomes, to being divorced and doing the lean thing all over again. I’ve been up and down and up and down. I’m in a rather comfortable position now, but whenever I think “oh! extra money for the savings!” I happen to remember the car registration is due or that medical bill is coming next month or some such. Right now I have a nice savings, but I hate to peck at it for anything I don’t absolutely need. I’ve recently decided to peck at it (a lot) to accelerate my education and degree. I think you have to make decisions – they may be wrong – for what you are experiencing right now. Right now, I’m working towards my first degree, so I’m gonna put the $$$ and the effort into that. And those dinners out – meh, I don’t miss them so much. And maybe one of these days a lottery ticket is gonna pay big.
Karen, you’re wonderful to share your experiences, because I think it’s important for others who have experienced what you have realize they’re not alone. I hope Jane’s excellent and thought-provoking piece will get all of us thinking more clearly about our money attitudes and perhaps do some adjusting if they’re not as healthy as they should be. Thanks for commenting!